Only get into a texting relationship after considering all of these tips. Not only will it make for a better relationship, but it can also protect you from heartache in the future or a bruised ego in the present.
A new relationship is a delicate thing with so many potential pitfalls. Texting is often the best way to maintain contact and build chemistry, but it can also lead to misunderstandings and hurt feelings. Here are ten tips that will help you stay on the right side of those "new relationship rules" — or at least avoid too much drama;
1. Pause
Take your time to comprehend what someone said before you respond fully. If you need to ask for clarification or additional information, take a moment to write the text and then read it back to yourself before sending it. Not only will this prevent misunderstandings, but it also allows you time to think of an articulate response.
Furthermore, you'll gain the respect of others because you wasted no time replying with a thoughtful answer. You should, however, take only a short time to respond lest you become the one who becomes irritated.
2. Be Specific
It's easy to send an ambiguous message — "I'm fine" or "I'm good" — without giving too much information about what is bothering you. In a relationship, this is a little like saying, "I love you." These general phrases are nice and romantic, but they don't do much to help build a long-lasting relationship. A more specific approach provides clarity. This can be used in texting as well — "I'm down" or "I'm frustrated" are better than "Good morning!" or "Hi!"
3. Don't Overreact
When someone sends you an angry text, take a moment to think about your response. An overreaction can cause a huge issue that might have been avoided. Sending a nasty reply will likely mean the end of an otherwise healthy relationship, so take a moment to think about your tone and words before sending them.
4. Observe and Allow
Your partner may have a bad habit or something that annoys you. If so, recognize this and observe it without judgment. Then, allow them to choose to change it. If you are always pointing things out, your partner will likely get defensive instead of becoming more receptive to your help. Turn-taking when texting into a two-way street, and you'll build respect for each other(New York Times).
5. Be Personal
Don't cut and paste into your conversations with a person. If the text you send is one you have used before, acknowledge the previous discussion and rephrase it to make it personal. This shows that you care and make your partner feel good about your relationship instead of making them feel like a number where each message is interchangeable with all others.
6. Respond as Future You
We do things that don't make sense to us when we are upset or angry. If you were to send a text message without thinking about it and then calm down, you'd regret that message. Don't expect your partner to "get" what you mean when you're not thinking clearly or emotionally. When responding to someone, have already considered what you want to say.
7. Know What You're Getting Into
Before you begin a text conversation with someone, have created a precise and efficient method of communication between the two of you. This doesn't mean that each message should be based on the same topic over an extended period. However, it would be best if you ensured everything was clear.
8. Read Receipt Deceit
Intentional or not, some people turn off the "read receipt" feature in their text messages. The same applies to voicemails and emails. This doesn't mean that the person isn't reading or listening to you; it's just that they are doing so when it's most convenient for them. Be aware of this, and don't get bent out of shape over it. Understanding the importance of these features is a good safeguard against misunderstandings.
9. Express Emotions in a Healthy Way
New relationships are a time to build chemistry and learn about your partner. Texting is a great way to get to know them better, as long as you keep everything in context. Emotions can get out of hand, though. If you say something hurtful or angry to someone you're seeing, you may end up with a damaged relationship or even a breakup. According to Forbes you should try to keep your emotions in check, and don't text when upset.
10. How Much is Too Much? and How Much is Not Enough?
The amount of text one can indicate how much one cares. The difference between this is that people sometimes need to gauge their levels of care accurately. Little use of texting can mean the sender doesn't want to make an effort to see their partner, or if it's too much, the receiver may be upset by it. If a person doesn't text enough or replies too quickly, they may be unwilling to invest in the relationship (Oprah Daily Show). It is up to the receiver to decide just how much they want to hear from you and if you are taking adequate time to respond.
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